The Truth Hurts(AKA Somebody's Gotta Pay)
by Mysia Ri
Summary: R is for language^_^(And it's not Tasuki whose using it). Oh, and, no offense to Boushin lovers aand it is yaoi-ish(Tas-Chi) but only at the very end. Read this with a dose of Humor. GOMEN-NASAI CHICHIRI-SAMA!!!


The Truth Hurts This was inspired and written on no sleep, so please don't kill me no da. It was inspired on the phone somewhere between 3 and 4AM when episode four of OVA 2 came up(you know, Chichiri's "You're really annoying, no da! I wish another poisonous snake would bite you, no da" line?).   
The last line of the story was inspired by something a friend of mine said: "And then, the clouds parted and God said, "I hate you, Velez"" when she was forced to clean up an alise of fallen cans@_@ Can't blame her, no da.   
OK, disclaimer time. This here anime don't belong ta me, so thar. Also, this is mildly Yaoi at the end and there is swearing(hence R rating.)and it's Tasuki/Chichiri(my favorite couple^_~v) 

The Truth Hurts(AKA, Somebody's Gotta Pay)

Suzaku was not only bored, he was angry(angry Phoenix, grrrrr). Tenkou had him helplessly locked away and his powers were weakening by the day. All he could do was wait for the Suzaku no Miko to help him. In the meantime, however, he had to do something.   
"I know! I'll use some of my powers to cast a truth spell on one of my seishi! But which one...which of my warriors would this be most effective on...got it! The only one whom everyone trusts!" 

Meanwhile, Nuriko was excitedly chiming "Sleepover!" as the seishi were invited to spend the night at his place.   
"That's not fair, why do those two always get their own room?" Tasuki gripped as Miaka and Taka/Tamahome headed for bed.   
"They're the exception, besides, you're hurt, remember?" Chiriko replied.   
"Come, Tasuki. Let me tell you all about my wonderful son, Boushin," Hotohori smiled. 

The's when it happened.   
Chichiri was sitting as a nearby table sipping at some green tea. He sensed a spell being cast, but couldn't tell who had cast it or on whom it had been cast.   
"No one wants to hear about your bastard-child, Heika-sama." Now he knew. All eyes were on the monk as his hands flew to his mouth; Mitsukake's hands covering Chiriko's ears.   
"W-what did you say?" Hotohori gasped.   
Trapped because of the spell, Chichiri winced. "A truth spell was cast on me" is what he wanted to say, but instead...   
"I said that no one wants to hear about your bastard-child," he whined. Hotohori trembled with rage.   
"Chichiri! What has gotten into you?" Mitsukake asked in shock.   
"Someone cast a truth spell on me, no da." 'Wrong answer, Houjun,' he cringed, noting Hotohori's rising anger.   
Tasuki began laughing hysterically. "Gomen, Heika-sama, but it's true!"   
Chichiri's head hit the table with a thud.   
"Sooooo, you have to tell the truth?" Nuriko asked.   
"Hai, until the spell wears off, no da."   
Nuriko grinned. Everyone told the wandering monktheir deepest, darkest secrets. This was a golden opportunity that no one was going to pass up easily.   
"Hey, Chichiri," the cross-dressing seishi began. "Does Hotohori-sama like me?"   
'Oh no,' the mage cringed, knowing that he couldn't resist. "Hai, Heika-sama is deeply in love with you, no da."   
"WAII!!!!" Nuriko cheered. Hotohori's face fell.   
"That was suppose to remain between us..." 'If Nuriko can extract information about the others from Chichiri, then perhaps...' "Chichiri, Taka's hair-"   
"A cheap toupee." The emperor didn't even need to finish that one.   
Taka/Tamahome growled. "Hey Chichiri," he called deciding that if he wasn't going down alone. "Why does Tasuki hate milk so much?"   
"Bad memories of his mother trying to breast-feed him, no da."   
And so it went. Question after question as the seishi pried into eachother's lives via Chichiri's knowledge. He was even forced to reveal his past at Tasuki's request.   
Soon, people ran out of questions and bonds were strengthened as the seishi offered help where it was needed. Tasuki, on the other hand, waited util everyone was done with Chichiri's knowledge and rose, ready to seek an answer to a difficult question that had been plagueing him since he had first met the monk at the palace.   
"Chichiri, three things that descibe the person you are most in love with right now."   
Tears welling up in his eyes, he replied, "Hot, Fang-boy, Tsubasa."   
A grin of purely evil intent spread across the bandit's face as he recieved the answer he'd been looking for. "And what do you want ta do tonight?"   
::Sigh of Surrender:: "I want you to fuck me all night long, no d-" His hands once again flew to his mouth, but it was too late.   
"If ya say so, Chiri," Tasuki grinned. He lifted the monk and carried him off. "I know where there's a nice closet we can get cosy in..." 

And then, the clouds opened and Suzaku said, "I hate you, Ri." 

~~~~~~~Owari~~~~~~~ 

Chichiri: Thank Suzaku that's over, no da.   
Tasuki: Heeeeeeey Chiri! Aishiteru::kiss::   
Chichiri: Aishiteru::kiss::   
Mysia: Hey! What about me?   
Tas-Chi: ::sigh:: Aishiteru, My-chan (no da)::kiss kiss::   
Mysia: That's better. Please don't kill me because I love Chichiri, but I am lacking sleep and it sounded funny to me, no da. Oyasumi, no da::falls asleep on keyboard:: 

PS: FYI, at present, I have a Prelude and three chapters up for Fushigi Akugi and I need reviews, so please read and review this and other stories by me, no da!^_^Arigatou 


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